Chastity Lockdown - Week 2

The last week has been one of the most difficult chastity period i have experienced so far, i almost regret not taking the opportunity to cum, before the chastity lockdown started. I have gone longer before, but Domina did Her best to keep me as horny as possible.
It also seems like She has been playing with my perception of time subliminally, because time seems to crawl and i keep forgetting what day of the week it is, but i have no proof of it.
The first days were still OK, but since Tuesday, the urge to stroke is present almost permanently. One night i lay in bed and my cock went rock hard while i was trying to sleep. It didn't take long until i was on the edge without touching and i felt like i would cum any moment. Then i woke up and realized that i had slipped into sleep and carried the arousal over into my dreams.
During the days, i have little control of my cock. It sometimes gets hard without me having erotic thoughts, other times, nothing happens, even if i'm thinking about sexy things. It's not mine any more, my Owner controls, what i feel...

Today, the second week of the lockdown started. There will be a few opportunities to edge and i'm looking forward to them, but Domina also announced, that there will be additional teasing. This weeks file didn't reinforce the mental chastity device, like i had expected. After taking me into trance and waking me up again a couple of times, Domina let me focus on my desire to cum. A very wicked suggestion given my state of frustration. But She turned my desire against me by making me think about how much better it feels to cum after being denied for some time. Even as i write this, my cock is hard again and i'm horny as hell, but i'm loosing control of my desires and want my Owner to decide what pleasure i get. I'm beginning to understand, that this lockdown is not a game. It's so much more, it will likely introduce a new level of control...

And there is not only the lockdown... Lady Helena has challenged me! She said, that She can stay chaste longer than me. I think, She knows very well, that i can't pass on such a challenge and i'm eager to take it, but i need to ask our Domina about it, it's Her decision...

Chastity Lockdown

On Tuesday, Domina Shelle opened the sign-up for a new chastity training called Lockdown. She gave Her slaves the option to sign up for one week or until Valentines-day. Of course i chose the long option... The last three days have been a preparation for the lockup with slow masturbation and the option to either cum once each day or stay chaste and only edge. I'm already chaste still end of October, but i decided against cumming. I love the aroused and slightly desperate state i'm in and i also want to prove my obedience by making the lock-down more difficult for me.

I have also continued to listen to Paralysis - Carnal Desire and the effects on my dreams are noticeable. I don't remember many details, but i woke up horny and in a slightly confused state a couple of times and from last night, i remember a little more. I was kneeling at my Owner's feet and started by kissing Her boots until She told me to slowly work up my way on Her legs. I finally found myself with my head between her thighs and She allowed me to pleasure Her while Her foot rested between my legs, slightly pressing down to encourage me. Unfortunately, i woke again at this point and it took me very long to fall asleep again with these images in my head...

This afternoon, i had an impulse to check Her website to see, whether the Lockdown recordings and instructions had already been released and to my delight, they were... i had just started to read the description when my email indicator lit up and the email announcing the lockdown start had arrived. It's not the first time, that i seem to feel it a few seconds before i receive Her instructions and it has also happened with Lady Helena earlier this week. It's a bit spooky...

I immediately downloaded the Lockdown session and started to read the included instructions. There will be a different training session for each week, a new mantra and a daily routine with a thought of the day.

I had to wait until the evening before i could listen to the session, but then, i didn't wait any time and listened to it. It was no surprise, that i woke up in mental chastity, but Domina also used the session to turn me on as much as possible. The last weeks of chastity were not too difficult, but listening to this session daily will change this. I'm still looking forward to being really desperate, but being subjected to this level of teasing for almost four weeks might get more challenging than i thought...

Hard torture

I'm exhausted... and full of endorphin... Lady Helena caused this in the session we just had.
When we talked before starting the session, She announced, that it would be more fun for Her than for me and i knew that things would be getting intense. Still i was looking forward to have my limits pushed once again.

While i was getting prepared by connecting my estim-device to a butt-plug and rings around my cock, strapping the shock-collar to my thigh and the nipple-puller on my chest, She explained to me, what was going to happen.

I would be bound to the kneeling-post and once She had locked my hands in the stocks behind my back, i would be tortured for 30 minutes while chanting my mantra.
As a little twist, the torture would get more intense the more i would scream...



So i knelt down, strapped my thighs and chest to the post and let Her lock my hands. I started to recite my mantra and for the first few minutes, nothing happened. Then i felt a slight tingle on my thigh that i still could ignore. I heared clicks and knew, that She was adjusting the settings of my devices. The nipple-puller sprang to live and my nipples were stretched a bit, but it was still tolerable and i was looking forward to more pain. I heared more clicks and slowly felt and increasing tingle in my cock. It felt good and concentrating on my mantra was starting to get a bit difficult.
After a few more minutes, the real torture began. She had increased the power of the shock-collar to a level that made me yelp each time and the tingling in my cock had become strong enough to make me drip. I now had to concentrate on not getting too close to the edge, too!
Chanting my mantra was becoming difficult and each time i managed to concentrate again, there were more shocks to distract me. Although i have repeated those lines hundreds of times, i started to make more and more mistakes, mixing things up and starting over from the beginning.
After a few more turns of the nipple-puller, i felt a sharp pain on my left nipple. The clamp had slipped off! Ouch!!! But since the left clamp was still on, there was no reason not to tighten it even more...
I could hear Lady Helena giggling while She increased the power of the estim-device and the frequency of the shocks. A couple of times, She had the estim so high, that i thought, that i would cum soon, but She always turned it off at the right moment, only to start a new cycle.

I think it was after 15 or 20 minutes, when the kneeling position started to add to the torture. It was getting exhausting and my knees started to hurt, but due to the straps, there was no chance to adjust my position. I began to sweat and my whole body was in pain.
Lady Helena was ramping up the torture mercilessly. More pull on my nipples, much more than i had dared to try when i tested the nipple-puller and the estim was now at a level that felt like my cock was in a vice. Only a bit more and She would have forced me to cum. I fought to hold back, because at that level of electricity, and orgasm would be extremely unpleasant! She must have guessed from my voice how close i was, because She stopped the stimulation before it was to late... only to start a new cycle...
By the end of our session, She used the shock-collar on almost every word i managed to utter. I was screaming more than chanting my mantra and i barely managed to complete any sentence. I was unable to think straight, there was only the pain from my nipples and the shocks combined with the intense stimulation of my cock. The world around me was gone, i was in sub-space...
All the sensations together with the knowledge of how much fun Lady Helena was having were overwhelming and at that point, i didn't mind the pain any more, i just felt amazing!

I'm not sure, how long this last stage lasted, but finally the stocks opened and my hands were free. I removed the remaining clover-clamp and didn't even feel the pain that should have been there after having my nipple pulled for half an hour. I was feeling extremely good!
I kept kneeling on the post, while we talked a bit more before saying goodbye and only afterwards, i realized, how sore my knees are now.
But i feel happy, extremely happy... i want to do this again soon!

Succubus visit

This week's session is called Paralysis - Carnal Desires. I always can't wait to listen to a new session, but reading the word 'paralysis' made me look forward to it even more. I always love to be paralyzed during a session, it boosts the feeling of being helpless and controlled.
I listened for the first time yesterday and Domina Shelle started to turn my body feeling very heavy from the very beginning of the session and soon, it felt like my mind had forgotten how to move my limbs.
Once i was deep in trance, She created the feeling of a presence sitting heavily on my chest. It was Her, in the form of a succubus. She continued to arouse me, driving me close to the edge and at the same time, She prepare my mind to dream about the succubus visiting me again in my dreams.
The file ended with whispers that reinforced the suggestions i had received. Domina didn't wake me up and so i lay there, remaining paralyzed and in trance. I tried to wake up after a moment, but i was unable to. Any thought i was trying to have vanished immediately. I finally woke up by the noise of the window-blinds going down, i wonder how long i would have stayed in trance without...

Although i rarely have erotic dreams, i was looking forward to one when i went to bed and i was positive, that the suggestions would work. And indeed, i had one, sexier and more vivid than ever before. It started with a Succubus-Mistress having me tied to a post. She told me to look to the floor, so i didn't see Her face, only Her sexy feet in sheer stockings. She began to spank the front of my thighs with a heavy can and i began to whimper. But soon, the pain turned into pleasure and i closed my eyes to really savor it.
Then i was standing on very high heels, with my hands tied to an overhead rail. There must have been some kind of motor, because i was dragged forward and struggled to follow in the high-heels. I walk until i couldn't keep up any more and collapsed into the restraints. The next moment, i was kneeling in front of the Mistress, apologizing for my failure and asking for a punishment.
I woke up at this point, turned on beyond believe and my cock rock hard. I normally turn over when i wake up from a dream and drift of to sleep again, but this time i stayed in the position i woke up in. I'm not sure if i was paralyzed, i didn't think about much besides my arousal and the memories of the dream at that point, but i could imagine, that i was...

I listened again this afternoon, hoping for another dream this night and i'm positive, that it will work again...

Spanked and shocked

Today was the first time Domina Shelle used my remote-control system during a call. We had planned that for so long, but there were always circumstances that had prevented us from playing. She had already become a bit jealous that Lady Helena had all the fun...
So i got into position kneeling in front of the spanking-bench and also put the shock-collar around my thigh. "Just in case i want to try it" She said...
I put my hands into the fist-mittens, got them into position on the electromagnet and Domina activated it. This moment always gives me a rush, as i know, that i'll be totally helpless from now on.

Domina Shelle started to take me into a light trance and a bit later, She started to spank and shock me. One might think, that this would wake me up again, but pain alone get get me into a trance-like state and so, both work together very well. Soon i had forgotten my surroundings and was concentrating totally on my Owner's voice and the sensations i felt.
My shock-collar has a built-in buzzer and besides the shock button, i had put two more buttons on the web-interface. One makes the collar beep, the other one beep and shock. I didn't need to explain my intention with these buttons. Domina used the beep&shock function a couple of times, before She started to tease me with only the beep. The shock that i had expected didn't come, but i moaned anyway. Partly in preparation for processing the pain that i was expecting, partly from relief.
Other times, She used the shocks without the beep, giggling about my yelp of surprise and pain. "Awwww, poor baby...". I could hear from Her voice, how She enjoyed the sounds i was making.
"I could just leave you here for 30 minutes and set the spanking-machine on automatic..." She teased me. Although i knew, that She was not serious, the thought of receiving 30 minutes of non-stop spanking crossed my mind. With the machine running at 50 strokes per minute, there would not be much skin left...

She read me a bit from a book with femdom short-stories that i gave Her for Christmas, continuing to spank and shock me. Then She suddenly announced, that She would leave me alone for a few minutes. My headphone went silent and i was left kneeling in front of the spanking bench with my arms stretched out in front of me. I got aware of the stinging sensation off my ass cheeks and wondered, how they might look. But i couldn't check and only wait. Time crawled and i was wondering if my Owner would surprise me with some spanks or shocks. But nothing happened for a long time.
From the position i was in, i couldn't see the clock and i started to wonder if my Owner would really come back. Then, after what felt like an eternity, i heared the spanking-machine come to live. A couple of quick swats, then it stopped again. Then the shock-collar beeped and a moment later, i felt the shock. It didn't really surprise me after the spanks, but then it beeped again without giving me a break. And i felt the shock. And the next beep came immediately. "Please let this only be the teasing beep...", but the shock came too. I was whimpering... Beep, shock, beep, shock, beep shock...
Then i was alone again... my mind started to race... the shocks could come again any moment...
But nothing happened for a long time. I was grateful, that i had cushioned the spanking-bench, but even with cushioning, it got a bit uncomfortable and my elbows began to hurt.
Then, finally, i heared the sound of a skype-message. I tested and my hands were free. I removed the fist-mitts, got back to my laptop and after some final chat, Domina released me with the instruction to listen to Her voice before i go to bed.
I checked my ass-cheeks... they were nicely swollen, enough to give me a nice reminder when i lay in bed later and listen to my Owner's voice...

Happy New Year

a bit late, but: Happy New Year to all my readers!!!

I have used the quiet time between Christmas and New Year to improve my remote control system. I'm working on a scripting system that will allow me control it's functions in conjunction with a playlist of hypnosis files, but most of all, i have build a much better nipple puller...


the old one was mounted to my bed, but the new one isn't stationary any more and it get's strapped to my chest and i'm only limited be the cable.
Besides that, it's crazy strong! The stepper-motor i used is totally overkill, but i had that one in a drawer... i tested with a weight of 5kg and it could lift it without any problems. I think, the aluminum bar will bend before the motor reaches it's limit...

I couldn't make myself go so far to have it pull the clover-clamps off my nipples while i was testing, but i'm sure that will be no problem at all (ouch!).
I can't wait to try it in a session (or rather have it tried on me), although i'm pretty sure, that Lady Helena will prove that it can pull the clamps off... i'm excited by the thought of being unable to stop Her as much as it scares me...


Like every week, Domina Shelle released a new file on Saturday. It's difficult to write about it, because Subliminized is like the title suggests, a subliminal programming. After putting me in deep trance by waking me up and dropping me down repeatedly, Domina's voices faded and i was left alone with Her whispers. At first, i tried to understand Her words, but soon, i zoned out too uch to follow. There are strong amnesia suggestions in this file, so i have no recollection of what She did and whenever i try, the few memories i have dissolve. I can only tell, that i felt totally relaxed and very cozy, almost like after waking up for the first time in the morning and altering between sleep and being awake.
I woke up in a happy state, knowing that i didn't have to worry about what She did. She said, that there will be a second subliminal session (i'm not even sure if that was part of the first one or anywhere else) and i'm looking forward to be Her hypnotic subject again!